Unlucky 13
by Yoshpa Kong
Summary: 13 people are invited to Wiggler's for a housewarming sleepover for some reason, but when things take a deadly turn, who is to blame? Rated T for obvious reasons.
1. How It Begins

_I've tried writing something all week but keep giving up, so I've figured out a solution - make chapters shorter. I was reading through some of the older murder mystery fics by Owen96 and Kaiimi and realised that I wanted to do one of these, and I'll make them shorter but that means there'll be more chapters and more detail in what happens. Hope you enjoy my attempt to get back to story writing :)_

. . .

Mario | Luigi | Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

Luigi and Daisy were sat in their living room, watching TV while waiting for Mario and Peach to come back from their date.

"They said they'd be back 10 minutes ago!" Luigi sighed, "What if something's happened?"

"You're like this every time someone goes out, they're probably just running a little late. Y'know, like the other 1000 times?" Daisy rolled her eyes. Suddenly, they heard something come through the door.

"That'll be the post." Luigi smiled, walking up to the door and taking out a letter.

"Who's it from?" Daisy asked.

"Wiggler." Luigi said, confused.

"Hmm... what would he want?" Daisy questioned.

"Not sure, I'll open it." Luigi shrugged.

"Give me THAT!" Daisy snapped, taking the letter off Luigi.

_"Dear all, _

_You are all invited to my housewarming sleepover taking place this Saturday! I know it's short notice and all, with it being, like, Thursday, but I hope you can all make it! _

_Best wishes, Wiggler"_

"Housewarming sleepover..." Luigi thought aloud, "And he got the day wrong... it's Friday..."

"How strange..." Daisy noted, "OH WELL, I WANNA COME!"

"Well, guess we're coming. Are Mario and Peach invited?" Luigi winked.

"Wait, how are we going to get ready for a sleepover TOMORROW?" Daisy asked.

Luigi looked at Daisy with a childish grin on his face, before they both said, "LET'S PACK!"

They darted up the stairs, just as Mario and Peach came into the house.

"Ewwww!" Peach squealed.

"Gross..." Mario sighed, "Ooh! A letter!"

Mario picked up the letter and read it out loud.

"We're definitely going to that..." Peach grinned.

. . .

It was now Saturday morning, Yoshi and Birdo were all set to go to Wiggler's house early. They were going to have breakfast with him as Wiggler knew how much Yoshi liked... well, food.

"Hell yeah I like food!" Yoshi shouted.

"Yoshi, stop breaking the fourth wall." Birdo told.

"YOU DON'T CONTROL ME!" Yoshi kicked Birdo in the face.

Birdo rolled her eyes, "This is gonna be a fun day..."

"Anyway, let's go!" Yoshi grinned, dragging Birdo out the door.

. . .

As Yoshi and Birdo approached the house, Birdo had almost had enough of Yoshi's antics and was considering throwing him into the road. But she didn't.

"OH MY GOD!" Yoshi suddenly screamed.

"What?" Birdo asked.

"POPCORN CART!" Yoshi darted towards a red and white striped car.

"Why the hell would someone do that?" Birdo rolled her eyes.

"OH MY GOD!" Yoshi screamed again.

"What now?" Birdo sighed.

"ICE CREAM STORE!" Yoshi darted towards an ice cream cone on the floor.

Birdo sighed again, "Why are you so crazy? Let's just get to Wiggler's house..."

"LET'S GO TO YO MOMMA'S ASS!" Yoshi punched Birdo in the face.

Birdo sighed yet again, before storming away from Yoshi and to Wiggler's house.

. . .

As Birdo got closer to the house, she noticed a few drops of blood on the path.

"What's that?" Birdo asked, getting slightly worried, "Heh, maybe it's Yoshi."

She slowly walked up to the gate, and her jaw dropped at what she saw. Wiggler's dead body.

"AAAAH!" Birdo screamed, jumping over the gate to see if Wiggler was still alive.

No luck.

. . .

Mario | Luigi | Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

_Hope you enjoyed that chapter! Will probably do another few today :P_


	2. The Saddening Discovery

_Hello again :P Thanks to Owen96 who reviewed in what must be a record time of 4 minutes after I posted the story xD_

. . .

Mario | Luigi | Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

"What the hell do I do..." Birdo kept muttering to herself. Suddenly, she saw Yoshi stroll across to the gate.

He gasped, "BIRDO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!"

"IT WASN'T ME!" Birdo defended, "I found him like this!"

"YOU'RE A MURDERER!" Yoshi shrieked.

"It wasn't me!" Birdo shouted, "Please believe me..."

Yoshi sighed, "Ok... you promise it wasn't you?"

"I promise!" Birdo frantically nodded.

"Ok, let's go inside, because this house looks HUGE!" Yoshi winked, leading Birdo into the house.

. . .

After Yoshi and Birdo had finished breakfast, they heard a knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" Yoshi shouted, running towards the door. He opened it to see a whole group of people at the door - Mario, Luigi, Toad, Peach, Daisy and Toadette were all smiling at him.

"Hi!" Peach giggled.

"Hi!" Yoshi replied.

"Where's Wiggler?" Luigi asked.

"Umm... there's been..." Yoshi mumbled.

"What's happened?" Toadette asked.

"Well... when Birdo and I arrived here, we found Wiggler on the path... dead." Yoshi sighed.

Everybody gasped, "HOW?"

"We don't know, we just saw him there. There was nothing we could do." Yoshi hung his head.

"There's still a party, right?" Mario asked.

Everybody's heads turned towards him.

"What?" Mario protested.

"You sick perverted... sycophant!" Daisy spat. Everybody turned to her, "Ok, I don't know what sycophant means, but the rest is true..."

"Anyway, you guys better come in." Yoshi smiled sadly, letting the six people come in.

. . .

After an hour or two, everybody else had arrived - Wario, Waluigi, Wendy, Bowser and Kamek. They were all sat, shocked about Wiggler's death.

"So, who do you think did it?" Wendy inquired.

"What do you mean?" Toad asked.

"You think it was a murder?" Waluigi asked.

"Well done, Sherlock." Wendy rolled her eyes.

"He could've easily have fallen off the roof..." Wario spat.

"This is clearly a murder." Wendy said.

"How do you know?" Bowser raised an eyebrow-thing at Wendy.

"Because of this note?" Wendy rolled her eyes, taking out a note from her pocket.

"What note?" Luigi asked.

"OOH! NOTE!" Daisy squealed, "Gimme THAT!"

_"Guess what? I killed your friend. And you're all next. Lots of love, someone you don't know. Obviously, wouldn't that be so awkward? I mean, imagine if it was someone like Goombella, or Flurrie, or even Polari? I'm seriously dying with laughter at the thought of Polari or Goombella being a mass murderer. Ok, talk to you later."_

"Told you." Wendy smirked.

"Well, it's obviously Yoshi or Birdo then!" Mario accused.

"The letter said they didn't know us... dumbass." Yoshi spat.

"If they didn't know us, how would they know that Goombella, Flurrie and Polari are our friends?" Bowser asked.

"Oh..." Yoshi sighed.

"Anyway, I don't want to stay in a house with a killer, thanks." Wario waved to the others before walking up to the door. However, when he tried to open it, he discovered that it was locked.

"Shit... we're locked in!" Birdo cried.

"WE'RE GONNA DIE IN THIS HOUSE!" Luigi shrieked, running around randomly until he accidentally tripped over a table, falling out of the window.

"WEEGEE!" Daisy looked out of the window to see if Luigi was ok, but it was obvious that after he landed on the concrete path that he was dead.

"He's gone..." Toad muttered.

"Ugh, get over it." Waluigi rolled his eyes.

Everybody stared at Waluigi.

"What? No one liked him..." Waluigi muttered.

. . .

Mario | **Luigi** | Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

_Hope you enjoyed the chapter! xD_


	3. Decisions, Decisions

_Hi (again)! Time for yet another update of this today xD_

_Thanks to Owen96 and Soliddude1175 for reviewing, it means a lot to get 3 reviews in under an hour :P_

. . .

Mario | **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

"Well, I guess as we can't leave, and it's too early for lunch, we should organise where everyone is sleeping." Birdo shrugged.

"That sounds like a good idea... especially when my brother has just died." Mario smiled sarcastically at Birdo.

"You suggest something then!" Birdo retorted.

"Ok, let's just organise where people are sleeping now so we can try to enjoy ourselves." Peach smiled.

"And we can also try not to be murdered by the psychopath who is quite clearly living in this house." Bowser rolled his eyes.

"I repeat, just organise where people are sleeping and leave it there." Peach gritted her teeth.

They walked up the stairs to find four bedrooms.

"Well, for a huge house there aren't many bedrooms..." Toadette noted.

"SHUT UP!" Yoshi kicked Toadette in the face, making her cry out in pain.

"So, let's say that Mario, Peach and Daisy go together..." Wario organised.

"Then me, Birdo and... Waluigi?" Yoshi sighed, "This should be fun..."

"Toad, Toadette and Wario then." Bowser demanded.

"Which leaves the three ugly step-sisters to sleep in one room." Toad giggled.

"SAY THAT AGAIN YA LITTLE SHIT!" Kamek grabbed Toad, making him shake with fear. She smiled, putting him down.

. . .

Now they had organised who would be sleeping where, people were deciding whether to stay upstairs or watch some TV or have some lunch.

"I'm hungry!" Wendy nagged.

"That's a shocker..." Toadette snickered.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" Wendy shrieked.

"She said that's a shocker. Because you're fat." Mario said bluntly.

"Harrtarrtarrtarr." Daisy muttered to herself with an Irish accent.

"I'm sorry, what?" Yoshi asked.

"Rum." Daisy smiled, still with the Irish accent.

"WHY ARE YOU IRISH?" Toad shrieked, taking a chair from nowhere and beating Daisy over the head with it.

"What was that for?" Daisy asked, rubbing her head.

"Ahh, she's normal again..." Peach smiled.

"Anyway, we need to decide whether we're staying here, watching TV or making lunch." Birdo said.

"Why can't we just do our own thing?" Toad asked.

"Because then we'll be brutally murdered!" Kamek rolled her eyes.

"We'll be brutally murdered anyway..." Mario mumbled as if he was in a trance.

"What?" Bowser asked.

"None of us will ever live beyond this..." Mario said.

"Mario, what's wrong?" Peach asked.

"We'll all be murdered... the murderer will strike..." Mario said, still in a trance. Then, Mario walked off in a robotic fashion.

"We need to check on him later..." Wario muttered.

"What are we going to do?" Toadette stressed.

"We all need to stay in the same place, as then there's no chance we'll die." Daisy said.

"I guess we should have lunch, seeing as Ugly Step-Sister 1 is hungry." Waluigi smirked.

"You're hardly one to call her ugly..." Yoshi said.

"That's very true." Waluigi sighed.

"Well, we'll go and have lunch then." Kamek shrugged.

"What are we having?" Peach asked.

"I guess just some sandwiches, as Wiggler probably had a huge banquet planned for us." Wendy began to drool at the thought.

"You probably get banquets for breakfast, lunch and dinner." Birdo spat.

"SHUT UP!" Wendy stormed off.

. . .

"Must not be murdered..." Mario mumbled, opening a cupboard.

"Must die with dignity..." Mario muttered, searching through the cupboard.

"Better now than later..." Mario said, taking out a rope.

"Must not be murdered..." Mario mumbled, hanging it from the ceiling.

"If I am to go now..." Mario said, taking out a stool.

"May it be with dignity..." Mario muttered, before hanging himself. After a few seconds, he was dead, hanging from the ceiling.

An evil cackling could be heard for a few seconds, before the whole room was silent. Mario was dead.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

_Hope you enjoyed chapter 3! xD_


	4. Sandwiches

_Hello again! I'm really loving this story! Hope you are too :P_

_Thanks Soliddude1175 for reviewing!_

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

"Ok, I'll make the sandwiches!" Toadette volunteered, before walking into the kitchen. Her jaw dropped as she saw that there were 3 huge fridges packed with food, "Man, we might be dying here but this place is amazing!"

"Hey Toadette!" Toad giggled, making Toadette squeal with fright, "Did I scare you?"

"Just a little." Toadette rolled her eyes.

"I came to help you with the sandwiches!" Toad grinned.

"And think I was about to be murdered?" Toadette joked.

"Anyway, I know what each person wants now. Yoshi, Wario, Birdo and Kamek want chicken. Me, Bowser, Waluigi and Peach want ham. Daisy wants cheese. Wendy wants all of them plus pepperoni, tomato ketchup, mayonnaise, bacon, steak, barbecque sauce, tiger claw, crab paté, salmon paté, smoked salmon, scrambled egg, roast Parakarry, toad ears, Donkey Kong's tie, hair, teeth, toenails, fingernails, dog bones and mushrooms to be healthy." Toad sighed, "What a freak."

"Well, as Wiggler seemed to be a millionaire, we actually have all of that!" Toadette exclaimed.

"That's... bizarre." Toad said.

. . .

After about half an hour, the sandwiches were done (Wendy likes things to be exactly the way she wants it) and the group decided to watch some TV.

"What are we gonna watch?" Peach asked.

"I wanna watch The Simpsons!" Wario childishly squealed.

"SHUT UP!" Yoshi shrieked, kicking Wario in the face. However, Yoshi squealed in pain, clutching his foot.

"Yoshi, are you alright?" Birdo asked.

"I THINK WARIO'S FACE BROKE MY FOOT!" Yoshi shouted in agony.

"Are you okay?" Toad asked.

"SHUT UP!" Yoshi kicked Toad in the face as well, forgetting about the broken foot.

"Ok... I'm gonna go check on Mario..." Peach quickly said, before running out of the room.

"Well, I guess she'll finish her sandwiches later." Wario muttered, "Not that I planned to eat them."

Wemdy glanced at Wario, "They're MINE!"

"Shut it, Birdo." Birdo said, "Wait, what?"

"You told yourself to shut up when you weren't saying anything. Life isn't fair!" Toadette shrieked.

"That must be the most irritating thing I've ever heard. Kill yourself, you rotten toad." Kamek spat.

"LEAVE TOADETTE ALONE!" Waluigi screamed randomly, throwing Bowser's plate of sandwiches across the room.

"You BITCH!" Bowser jumped on Waluigi, slowly squashing the poor string bean to death.

"What the hell? You just killed Waluigi!" Wario screamed.

"You don't know he's dead." Daisy defended.

"He's a pancake!" Wendy rolled her eyes.

"You bastard!" Wario farted on Bowser's face.

"This is turning into a horror movie!" Toadette sighed, "Oh, wait, it is."

"What?" everybody turned to Toadette.

"This is a horror movie, where we'll all be brutally murdered or put in a massive battle!" Toadette giggled.

"Says who?" Yoshi asked.

"Says your mum." Toadette punched Yoshi in the face, "REVENGE!"

"Nobody EVER gets to punch Yoshi." Birdo gritted her teeth.

"That's not true." Wario sighed.

Suddenly, they heard a scream.

"Peach..." Daisy uttered.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | Waluigi | Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

_Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Will update again today xD_


	5. Weapons

_Hi, again, sorry about not mentioning Owen96 and Kaiimi for reviewing, I wrote the chapter last night when I didn't see your reviews, so I couldn't predict the future and mention you :P_

_Hope you enjoy this chapter :)_

_PS: I forgot Waluigi died xD_

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | **Waluigi **| Peach | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | Wendy | Kamek

. . .

"Peach!" Yoshi cried, storming up the stairs. He entered a room to find Peach in tears in front of Mario's dead body.

"Oh... my... god." Yoshi mumbled, "Peach, come on let's get out of this room."

However, Peach didn't respond.

"Peach?" Yoshi asked. He turned her over to find Peach's head barely hanging onto her neck, her arms and legs mauled and many scratches across her dress. He noticed teeth laying on the bed. Tears were staining her face, Yoshi guessed that was because she'd been tortured. Blood was everywhere - pouring from her eyes, nose, ears, mouth, everywhere.

Yoshi gasped, "How did we not notice this?"

"What's happened?" Daisy asked.

"Mario and Peach were both murdered..." Yoshi sighed.

Daisy burst into tears, "Four of us have gone... and three of them were amazing! Now there's only me and you who people actually care about!"

Yoshi smirked, "They don't care about you."

"OH YES THEY DO!" Daisy shrieked, running out of the room, "Heartless monster!"

Yoshi soon followed, creeped out by the dead bodies in the room.

. . .

"GUYS! PEACH AND MARIO ARE BOTH DEAD!" Daisy shrieked.

"Calm down, you're hurting my ears." Kamek whined.

"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY EARS!" Toadette screamed.

"Not this again..." Birdo sighed.

"Anyway, time to react shocked." Wario breathed in and out, "Ahhahhhahh."

"That was... better. I just need a bit more volume in your voice next time." Wendy smiled.

"DON'T YOU SMILE AT ME MISSY!" Wario turned into a swan and started pecking Wendy's face. After a few seconds, he turned back and began to spit everywhere.

"Eugh, tasted like when I had an addiction to eating candles." Wario sighed. There was a pause, "No flashback then..."

"You don't deserve one." Bowser spat.

"Nobody cares that Mario and Peach are dead, then?" Daisy asked.

"Not really. It's annoying that they always get so far. Actually, Mario never does, but no one likes Mario." Toad laughed.

"Fair enough." Daisy shrugged.

"So, what do we do now?" Birdo asked.

"I have no idea... how about we plan how to attack the little bitch who's trying to kill us." Bowser grinned.

"Ok, if Wiggler has tiger claws and toad ears in his fridge, he'll surely have some weapons." Yoshi entered the room, twirling a sword in his hand.

"OH MY GOD YOSHI! PUT THAT DOWN!" Wendy shrieked.

"SHUT UP!" Yoshi did a weird karate routine before throwing the sword at Wendy's face. It went straight through her eye, killing her immediately.

Bowser had a stunned look on his face. He turned to Yoshi, who gulped, but instead of attacking him, Bowser applauded.

"THANK YOU SO MUCH!" Bowser ran up to Yoshi and gave him a huge hug.

"Umm... you're welcome?" Yoshi said.

"Well, it may seem like a relief to you, Bowser, but we just lost another person!" Daisy cried, "We're never gonna get out of here!"

"Well, you won't." Toadette rolled her eyes.

"Excuse me?" Daisy's eyes widened at Toadette.

"All of the murderer's killings have been the 'main four' as you call them. Mario and Peach were both murdered, but Luigi, Waluigi and Wendy all died because of accidents or insane people throwing swords. Sorry to say this, Daisy, but you're doomed." Toadette said.

"I am NOT doomed." Daisy waved it off.

"I have to agree with Toadette..." Toad sighed.

"This is ridiculous! I'm not next! Now let's split up because then it'll increase our chances of dying and we can go look for weapons!" Daisy shrieked, slapping Toadette in the face.

. . .

**Group 1: **Yoshi | Bowser | Daisy | Kamek

**Group 2: **Toad | Wario | Birdo | Toadette

. . .

**Group 1...**

"So, Yoshi, where did you find that sword?" Kamek asked, looking at the sword in awe.

"I'm leading you there now, and besides, why would you need a sword if you have your wand?" Yoshi got confused.

"Well, I don't bring my wand to parties." Kamek rolled her eyes.

"You probably don't go to parties." Daisy smirked.

"SAY THAT AGAIN. I DARE YA." Kamek grabbed Daisy by the throat.

"I take it back, I'm sorry." Daisy panted.

Kamek smiled, letting go of Daisy's throat, "Good."

"WE'RE HERE!" Yoshi sung, doing a random twirl which resulted in a portal being formed.

"What da hell is that?" Bowser asked.

"I have no clue, but I wanna go inside!" Daisy cheered.

"Ok, guess we'll go investigate." Yoshi shrugged. The four then jumped into the portal.

. . .

**Group 2...**

"Does anyone have any idea where the weapons are?" Toad asked.

"Nope." Wario muttered.

"No." Birdo sighed.

"No." Toadette said.

"Nope." Birdo said.

"No." Wario mumbled.

"Nope." Toadette sighed.

"No." Toad said.

"Like, no!" Goombella cried.

"Goombella? When did you get here?" Toadette asked.

"Umm... potato!" Goombella shouted, before evaporating.

"K den." Wario uttered.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | Kamek


	6. Bang

_Hello again! Thanks to Owen96, who seems to be a huge fan of this story, for reviewing xD_

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | Kamek

. . .

**Group 1: Yoshi | Bowser | Daisy | Kamek**

"Well, this has taken a turn for the worse." Yoshi noted as the four were stuck in the portal. However, they were moving very slowly.

"We're gonna die in here before the murderer gets us!" Daisy squealed, before waving her legs around randomly.

"SHUT UP!" Yoshi screamed, kicking Daisy in the face. However, he bounced right off.

"What da hell?" Bowser asked.

"I have a bouncy face, get over it." Daisy defended. Just then, they dropped and landed on a carpet.

"Great, this was just the living room." Kamek rolled her eyes, "That was the biggest waste of time..."

. . .

**Group 2: Toad | Wario | Birdo | Toadette**

"Okay, I think I've found somewhere!" Toadette giggled.

"Shall we go in then?" Birdo asked.

"You go first." Toadette said quickly.

"How about Wario goes first?" Toad suggested, "Nobody likes him and he broke Yoshi's foot."

"Ok, Wario, you go in first." Birdo shoved Wario into the room.

Wario gasped.

Toad gasped.

Toadette gasped.

Birdo gasped.

Toad gasped.

Toadette gasped.

Birdo gasped.

Wario gasped.

Toadette gasped.

Toad gasped.

Wario gasped.

Birdo gasped.

"What was the point of this?" Wario asked, "It's fine..."

"Oh, are the weapons there?" Toad asked.

"YEAH." Wario shouted.

"Ok, we better come in then!" Toad called back.

"Let's." Toadette quickly said.

"Ooh, a katana!" Wario giggled maniacally.

"Should we get weapons for the others just in case?" Birdo asked.

"No." Toadette said, "Nobody likes them."

. . .

**Group 1: Yoshi | Bowser | Daisy | Kamek**

"Well, do we go looking for weapons again?" Daisy asked.

"Yeah, the others won't get us any." Bowser sighed.

"Ok, no portal making this time, Yoshi." Kamek rolled her eyes.

"Ok..." Yoshi hung his head.

As the group began to walk off, a shady figure watched from behind them.

"So, we know where we're going now?" Daisy asked.

"Yes, we turn left, then go straight ahead until we see a massive staircase." Yoshi said.

_Bang._

. . .

**Group 2: Toad | Wario | Birdo | Toadette**

"WE HAVE OUR WEAPONS!" Toad sung.

"WHAT A VERY FUN DAY!" Birdo joined in.

"WE HAVE OUR WEAPONS!" Toadette chanted.

"AND TOAD'S NAME IS MAY!" Wario sung awkwardly.

"No, Wario. Shut up." Toad spat, throwing Wario onto the floor.

The floorboards behind them began to creek.

"What was that?" Toadette asked.

"Look behind you!" Birdo rolled her eyes.

"I would, but this is a horror movie, people never look behind them." Toad sighed.

_Bang._

. . .

_So... two gunshots were fired, but is anyone dead?_


	7. I Can't Think of a Title

_Hi again! Thanks to Owen96, Soliddude1175, Kaiimi and Rockin Bros, and well done to Kaiimi for getting the Unlucky 13th review ;)_

_Anyway, the reason I haven't updated this over the last few days is because I have been ill since Tuesday. I managed to get a chapter out on Wednesday as I had the entire day at home but over the past two days I haven't been able to update. Also, I wanted to update after the Unlucky 13th review ;)_

_Hope you enjoy this chapter!_

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | Bowser | Wario | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | Kamek | New Character

. . .

**Group 1: Yoshi | Bowser | Daisy | Kamek**

A bloodcurdling scream could be heard as somebody fell to the ground, dead.

"Oh my god, I'd look around but I'm scared of blood!" Yoshi squealed, "Just kidding, let's see."

He turned around to see Bowser on the floor, blood pouring from his head.

"Oh... my... god..." Yoshi muttered, "Bowser!"

"Bowser's dead?!" Daisy exclaimed.

"Oh no." Kamek sighed emotionlessly.

"Where did you guys go?" Yoshi asked.

"We went to, umm, eat pie." Daisy admitted.

Suddenly, music began to play.

"I WANT PIE!

I WANT PIE!

FOR YOU AND I!

I REALLY WANT PIE!

BLUEBERRY AND CUSTARD!

BUT DEFINITELY NOT MUSTARD!

I REALLY, REALLY WANT PIE!"

The music stopped.

"What da hell?" Bowser's dead body asked, before falling dead again.

"I'm scared, can we leave in an animated fashion?" Daisy sighed.

"Let's." Kamek said, before they all ran away in an animated fashion. Yoshi had his hands on his head. Daisy was screaming like mad. And Kamek was there.

. . .

**Group 2: Toad | Wario | Birdo | Toadette**

"What was that?" Wario mumbled.

"I don't know..." Birdo said, "But it sounded like a gunshot.

"Well, I'm fine." Toadette shrugged.

"Me too, I hope." Toad smirked.

"Well then, what was that?" Wario repeated.

"HEY GUYS!" a mysterious figure shrieked, running up to the group.

"VIVIAN?!" the group cried.

"Hey." Vivian waved.

"This was you?" Birdo asked.

"What was?" Vivian asked.

"You've been killing us." Toad scowled.

"What? No!" Vivian denied, "I'm just here. Story logic."

"Explain the gunshot then." Birdo rolled her eyes.

"Well, I just farted." Vivian admitted.

Wario sighed with relief, "WE'RE ALL SAFE! PRAISE THE SHADOW QUEEN!"

Everybody stared at him.

"What?" Wario frowned.

"The Shadow Queen is EVIL. Like the Queen of England." Toadette said childishly.

"O...k..." Birdo slowly said.

"Well, can I, like, stay with you, if there's a murderer around." Vivian suggested.

"How did you know there's a murderer around?" Toad asked suspiciously.

"Because you told me..." Vivian rolled her eyes.

"Oh..." Toad muttered.

. . .

**Group 1: Yoshi | Daisy | Kamek**

"So when we even try to get weapons, somebody dies..." Daisy sighed.

"This sucks." Yoshi said.

"I agree." Kamek agreed, "And I'm hardly gonna survive to the end."

"How'd you work that out?" Yoshi asked.

"Well, I'm hardly a very memorable person, and Yoshpa Kong doesn't really like me." Kamek sighed.

"That's not true..." Daisy supported.

"Yes it is." Kamek rolled her eyes.

"Maybe it is..." Daisy smiled, "But... umm... SAY CHEESE!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Kamek shrieked, jumping through the roof. She then landed back on the ground, with no head for some reason.

"O...k then." Yoshi said awkwardly.

. . .

**Group 2: Toad | Wario | Birdo | Toadette | Vivian**

"So... what do we do now?" Birdo asked.

"Crabcakes." Wario said.

"Ok." Birdo muttered, taking out a random machine gun from her pocket and firing it at Wario.

"AAAAH!" Wario shrieked, before dropping to the floor. It was obvious from the many bullet marks in his chest and head that Wario was dead.

"HALLELUJAH!" Soliddude1175 cheered, before evaporating like Goombella.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | **Kamek** | Vivian

. . .

_I hope you enjoyed that chapter! Now only six of our now Unlucky 14 ( ;) ) remain, but there's more drama to come for them._


	8. I WANT A MANSION!

_Hello again! I'm gonna reply to everyone's reviews individually in the story (heh, like the old times), because there were 5 for this chapter. Thanks to everybody who did review, this story reached 20 reviews!_

_**Owen96: **__Haha, yeah, I felt like I should get rid of a lot of characters that I felt weren't popular. You'll see if Birdo, Daisy and Yoshi survive this chapter and beyond... soon :P_

_**Rockin Bros: **__Yeah, plot twist :P I used author powers to kill people BECAUSE I CAN! Yeah, everybody should worship Birdo from now on. _

_**Yoshilla-Rhedosaurus: **__You must be the only one who will ever miss Wario xD The thought of DK being the killer never occurred to me, but I've decided who the killer will be now so, yeah..._

_**Soliddude1175: **__Yes, RIP Kamek. And I'm gradually getting better lol. It won't stop me!_

_**Kaiimi: **__Haha, the 13th review is a blessing! You'll see ;)_

_By the way, it's just a co-incidence that my favourite 6 characters are the ones remaining :P_

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | Toad | **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | **Kamek** | Vivian

. . .

**Group 2: Yoshi | Daisy**

"Well, I guess it's just us two to get weapons for..." Yoshi sighed.

"Why does everybody die on our watch?" Daisy whined.

"I have no idea, but it happened, so... umm... SHUT UP!" Yoshi kicked Daisy in the face.

"What the hell?" Daisy asked, getting up.

"I don't know." Yoshi said, "I'm sorry."

"Ok, I forgive you." David replied.

"DAVID? AUTHOR, Y U TYPO?" Yoshi shrieked.

"It's ok..." Daisy tried to hold back tears.

"IT'S NOT OK!" Yoshi cried.

"Ok... just calm down and get some weapons." Daisy could feel tears falling down her face, "Then we can kill David."

"Yeah, let's kill David!" Yoshi cheered.

. . .

**Group 1: Toad | Birdo | Toadette | Vivian**

"Well, Birdo, I'm just so happy you killed Wario." Toad praised.

"Yeah, you deserve an award." Toadette smiled.

"Who's Wario?" Vivian asked.

"A piece of bacon, I think..." Toadette looked puzzled.

"Ah, I love bacon..." Vivian drooled.

"Can we keep going?" Birdo moaned, "Since Vivian joined, we need to get her a weapon."

"Ok, stressy." Vivian rolled her eyes.

"Stressy legend - she killed Wario!" Toad defended.

"She can request a mansion if she wanted." Toadette said, "But that'd be weird, because we're already in one..."

"Yeah, that would be strange." Vivian said awkwardly.

"I WANT A MANSION!" Birdo shrieked, ripping out a bit of wall and crushing Toad with it. Toad died instantly.

"Why do I get the feeling we're about to die?" Toadette asked.

"Because we're probably about to die." Vivian said, before dragging Toadette with her as she ran. Birdo began to chase them with the bit of the wall.

. . .

**Group 2: Yoshi | Daisy**

Yoshi and Daisy had finally reached the fourth weapon room, and they were searching for the right weapons. However, they heard another knock on the door as they were searching.

"AAAH! IT'S THE KILLER!" Yoshi shrieked, throwing a random sword at the door.

Toadette and Vivian came panting through.

"It's just us!" Toadette reassured.

"Vivian?" Daisy asked.

"I joined them somehow!" Vivian cheered.

"You BITCH!" Daisy began to pull Vivian's hair.

"Umm... wrong story." Vivian said awkwardly.

"Ohh..." Daisy muttered.

"Where's Birdo, Toad Wario?" Yoshi asked.

"Umm... Birdo went slightly insane, shot Wario multiple times, then she killed Toad as well. Then she was going to kill us but we managed to run away." Toadette explained.

"Oh shit." Yoshi cursed.

"Well, at least you made it out alive." Daisy smiled.

"Anyway, what happened to Kamek and Bowser?" Toadette asked.

"They both died. Bowser was shot and Kamek did a weird jump through the roof and got decapitated." Yoshi said, confused.

"So, what are we gonna do about Birdo?" Vivian asked.

"It gives me no pleasure to say this, but I think we have to kill her." Daisy sighed.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | **Toad **| **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | **Kamek** | Vivian

. . .

_So... Birdo's gone insane and killed Toad, Vivian and Toadette have found Yoshi and Daisy, they're plotting to kill Birdo, but most importantly, Yoshi is the last boy standing ;) _

_Hope you enjoyed the chapter!_


	9. Eat a Machete

_Hello once again! I have made a decision about this story. Now there are five characters left, the story may be finished today, but this is the last chapter until the killer is revealed. If you want to take a guess, now's your last chance. Also, I'm going to plan a sequel, which will be out within the next week depending on how well I've planned it. Anyway, thanks to Owen96 for reviewing, and I hope you enjoy this chapter!_

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | **Toad **| **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | Daisy | Birdo | Toadette | **Wendy** | **Kamek** | Vivian

. . .

"How do we plan to kill Birdo?" Toadette asked, "I mean, she's insane and all, but she's still our friend!"

"But if we don't kill her, she'll kill us!" Daisy sighed.

"Ok, let's just get as many weapons as possible and plan our first attack." Yoshi said.

Vivian giggled, "Heehee, this feels like the Crusades!"

"But what if that first attack fails?" Toadette asked again, "What do we do then?"

"I can't guarantee that everybody will survive this, but we need to stay calm." Daisy replied, sighing sadly.

"Well, if one person dies, do we just attack again, knowing there's a good chance someone else will die, until she wins?" Toadette questioned.

"Ok, Toadette, you're clearly not brave enough to do this." Yoshi stated, "So we will have to kill you."

"Ok, I'm sorry!" Toadette defended, "I'll do it."

"Good." Daisy smiled, "Now, we need 3 weapons each, because I'm greedy."

"Ok, let's just choose 3 weapons that we want and attack." Vivian said bravely.

"Let's go!" Yoshi accidentally kicked Toadette in the face, causing her to stumble back onto a sword. She shrieked as the sword impaled her neck.

"NO! TOADETTE!" Vivian shrieked.

"Nobody cares." Daisy rolled her eyes.

**YOSHI: **Sword, Flame Thrower, Acid

**DAISY: **Machine Gun, Nicki Minaj music, Machete

**VIVIAN: **Bazooka, Butcher's knife, Mace

. . .

Meanwhile, Birdo was pacing around the hallway.

"Birdo. Want. Mansion." she muttered.

"Birdo. Want. Mansion."

"Birdo. Want. Mansion."

Birdo then punched the ceiling in rage. A small bit of rubble fell from the ceiling, hitting Birdo on the head. She squealed with pain, before stumbling around, confused.

"What just happened?" Birdo asked, "And where are the others?"

"OH GOD! THEY'RE ALL DEAD! I SURVIVED!" Birdo cheered, before running into Daisy, who had a machine gun in her hand.

"Aww, I'm not the last one..." Birdo frowned, "Anyway, hi."

"Hi..." Daisy said awkwardly.

"Do you want a mansion?" Vivian asked.

"No, I'm in a mansion, why?" Birdo rolled her eyes.

"HURRAH!" Yoshi cheered, "SHE'S SANE!"

"When was I not sane?" Birdo asked.

"Never mind." Vivian waved it off.

"Why do you all have weapons?" Birdo asked.

"Because they're tasty." Yoshi lied, "Daisy, eat your machete."

"Bu-" Daisy protested.

"EAT IT!" Yoshi ordered.

"Ok..." Daisy munched on her machete, faking 'yum' sounds as she did so. After 5 minutes, she began to choke on it, before the machete ripped its way through her throat. She gurgled as blood poured from her throat, before giving up and falling to the floor. Vivian, Yoshi and Birdo looked on in shock at Daisy's dead body.

"HAHA! ONLY THREE OF YOU ARE LEFT!" the killer screamed, and the three remaining turned their heads.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | **Toad **| **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | **Daisy** | Birdo | **Toadette **| **Wendy** | **Kamek** | Vivian

. . .

_So... who do you think is the killer? Hope you enjoyed the chapter!_


	10. We Are Going To Kill You

_Hello! There will only be a few more chapters left of this - 3 at most, but probably 2. So, you've made your guesses as to who is the killer, but are any of you right? It's time for you to find out._

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | **Toad **| **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | **Daisy** | Birdo | **Toadette **| **Wendy** | **Kamek** | Vivian

. . .

"It was you?" Birdo asked.

"Who are you?" Vivian asked.

"Who am I?" Yoshi asked.

"SHUT UP YOU WHINEY SHITS!" the killer shrieked, "I'm concentrating..."

"Concentrating on what?" Vivian asked, "And who are you?"

"I know who she is," Yoshi said, gulping, "It's..."

"That's right." the killer rolled her eyes, "It's me - Zess T."

"Again, who are you?" Vivian repeated.

"Well, Curly Wurly, since you ask, I am Zess T, the chef for the Mario gang. They always insulted my food and my attitude, but I was clearly misunderstood." Zess T explained.

"And clearly insane." Birdo rolled her eyes.

"Shut it, Hee Shee." Zess T snapped, "Anyway, people never appreciated what I had done, no matter how hard I tried. It made me depressed and lead me to this."

"How did you even kill all of us?" Yoshi asked.

"Well, Green Giant, it was easy once I made Wiggler hold a sleepover." Zess T shrugged.

"Wiggler was in on this?" Vivian asked, confused.

"No, let's just say that somebody influenced him to do this. Then I killed him." Zess T smiled, "I wasn't alone."

"Well, who else did it then?" Birdo questioned. As she said this, somebody else walked behind Zess T.

"Hi guys." Tayce T smiled.

"Why did you help Zess T kill people?" Yoshi asked, raising his fist.

"Because I was sick of everybody taking me for granted and I felt sorry for Zess T." Tayce T admitted.

"Anyway, what were you 'concentrating' on earlier?" Vivian looked at Zess T.

"My psychic powers. In a few moments, you will jump out of the window." Zess T smirked.

"No she won't." Yoshi rolled his eyes.

Suddenly, Vivian walked off, stopped next to a window.

"Oh shit." Vivian sighed, before jumping out of the window. There was a scream as Vivian fell through the sky, before a splat could be heard.

"Ouch." Birdo cringed.

"Why are you doing this?" Yoshi asked.

"That's simple. First of all, I made Luigi run around and fall out of the window," Zess T explained, "Then, with Mario, I did the same and made him hang himself. Then I made Bowser sit on Waluigi, thus killing him. After that, I let Tayce T brutally murder Peach after she found Mario's dead body. There was a long string of torture there, and I got to watch..."

. . .

**FLASHBACK (WARNING: Contains a lot of blood and gore)**

_Peach rushed up the stairs_

_"MARIO?" she cried, before entering a room. She saw a rope hanging from the ceiling._

_"Please no..." she muttered to herself. She ran up to the rope, and below it was Mario. There was another evil cackling as Peach bursted into tears._

_"We've found another..." Zess T cackled._

_"Can I have this one?" Tayce T moaned._

_"Of course." Zess T smiled._

_"Who are you?" Peach asked._

_"We're your murderers." Tayce T smirked._

_"It was YOU?" Peach's eyes widened._

_"Yes, and you're next." Zess T said._

_Peach tried to scream, but Zess T quickly put a blanket over her mouth to muffle it. After getting the message, Zess T lowered the blanket off Peach's mouth and Tayce T stepped forward._

_"Why are you doing this..." tears fell from Peach's eyes._

_"Because we can." Zess T smiled._

_Tayce T then took out some tweezers and forced Peach's mouth open. Peach squealed in pain already, but the look on Tayce T's face told her it was only just beginning. She grabbed one of Peach's teeth and pulled it out violently. Blood poured from it, but Tayce T continued to pull more and more teeth out, throwing them on the bed, until only a few were left. Peach coughed all of the blood out, not wanting to die. Tayce T then grabbed Peach's left hand and dug the tweezers under the nail of the pinky, scraping it off. She did the same with the other fingers on the left hand, and tears fell from Peach's eyes as the pain was getting too much to handle. Tayce T grinned as she took a knife and dragged it across Peach's left arm. She then grabbed the right hand and did the same as she did with the left hand. Then, she took the knife again and did various cuts on it. Peach didn't even bother to protest. Tayce T grabbed her legs and slashed them many times with the knife, and more blood poured out. By now, Peach was a deathly pale. Tayce T then ripped her dress and Peach's eyes widened. Nobody ruins her dress. She kicked Tayce T in the face, which angered Tayce T. Thinking it should be over, Tayce T grabbed Peach's neck and continually strangled it until it was barely on her head. Blood continued to pour out from her mouth, hands, arms and legs. It was obvious now that Princess Peach was dead._

. . .

"Ah what fun that was..." Tayce T smiled.

"Anyway, then I also made Green Giant over there throw that sword at Surgery Whore," Zess T grinned, "After that, Tayce T fired a gunshot at Surgery Whore's dad, and I made Kamek shoot up into the air, while Tayce T cut her head off. Birdo killed Wario because nobody likes him. I also turned Birdo insane for a bit, making her kill Toad. Then she got better in like half an hour and I couldn't be bothered to do it again. I then also made the Green Giant kill Toadette by the weird kicking thing he always does. I figured that if he did that nobody would think it was weird because he'd done it so many times. And then Daisy just randomly ate the machete."

"Well, what are you going to do about us?" Birdo asked.

"I'm going to take you to a luxury hotel." Zess T rolled her eyes.

"I LOVE HOTELS!" Yoshi shrieked.

"We are going to kill you." Zess T smiled.

. . .

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | **Toad **| **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | **Daisy** | Birdo | **Toadette **| **Wendy** | **Kamek** | **Vivian**

VS

Zess T | Tayce T

. . .

_I hope you enjoyed that chapter, and I do think I went a bit over the top with Peach's death scene... :/_


	11. Remembering

_Hallo again! Welcome to the penultimate chapter of Unlucky 13. I've decided that instead of doing the sequel right away, I'm going to do a different story - one that I've also done a lot of. You can probably guess it, but if you can't, you'll find out soon enough. Anyway, thanks to Owen96, Soliddude1175, Rockin Bros, MarioZeldaFan and Kaiimi for reviewing, and I actually don't hate Peach! Anyway, I hope you enjoy the pre-grand finale._

**. . .**

**Mario **| **Luigi **| Yoshi | **Toad **| **Bowser **| **Wario** | **Waluigi **| **Peach** | **Daisy** | Birdo | **Toadette **| **Wendy** | **Kamek** | **Vivian**

VS

Zess T | Tayce T

. . .

"We will give you 10 minutes to hide separately across the mansion. If we catch you together, you'll be tortured. If we catch you after 30 minutes of searching, we will kill you. Comprende?" Tayce T grinned evilly.

Birdo and Yoshi nodded slowly and sadly.

"Off you trot." Zess T rolled her eyes, and Birdo and Yoshi darted off in different directions.

. . .

**YOSHI**

"Need to find a phone..." Yoshi muttered to himself repeatedly as he ran into different rooms.

"WHY ARE THERE NO PHONES?" he shrieked, before covering his mouth, realising they'd hear him. Luckily, they heard nothing. He sighed with relief before turning to a counter. There was a stack of paper with something below it. His eyes widened as he ran towards it, throwing the paper aside, to find a phone.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." he said quickly, looking to the sky. He was about to grab the phone, but noticed smoke coming from the numbers...

. . .

**BIRDO**

"Oh crap, where am I gonna hide?" Birdo said, tears appearing in her eyes. She was frantically running from room to room.

"How many minutes do I have left?" Birdo checked her watch, before her jaw dropped, "2."

"Go to the kitchen! They'll never look there!" Birdo cheered, before running down the stairs.

She was now in the kitchen, searching for a safer hiding place. She noticed an oven big enough for her to fit in.

"Eh, why not?" she shrugged, hopping into it. She sat there, legs and fingers crossed, before bursting into tears. Memories of all of her friends had come back to her. The good times she'd had with each of those who have died. Mario - the time he wet himself while the pair were having a coffee at McToad's. She let out a sad laugh, before letting out some more tears.

. . .

**YOSHI**

Yoshi was panicking about what the phone was about to do. He had no idea how long he had before Zess T and Tayce T would go after him. He needed to call someone or find an amazing hiding place. Suddenly, it all clicked. He turned to the window, before frantically opening it.

_"Ready or not, here we come!" _he could hear Zess T honk, before they both cackled evilly.

He jumped out of the window and landed on the ledge.

"Now I just need to get onto the roof. They'll never look there!" Yoshi smiled, before stepping onto the window sil. As he looked up, he saw a symbol. An L. It reminded him of Luigi, and the time he spent with Luigi at the park that one time - badmouthing Mario. He smiled, sadly, the reality of what was happening around him finally hitting. A single tear fell from his eyes, before he shook his head and continued climbing up the wall.

. . .

**BIRDO**

Birdo had heard the call from Zess T and Tayce T, despite the insulated environment she was currently in. The sound of either of their voices made Birdo sick, and they forced more tears from her.

"Stop it, Birdo. This isn't you." Birdo muttered to herself. Suddenly, she heard footsteps. More tears fell from her eyes, but she desperately tried not to show she was in the oven. She heard a door open, and trying to look to see if it was Tayce T or Zess T, she slowly opened the oven. Nobody was there. She sighed with relief, before carefully shutting the oven door. Even more tears fell from her eyes as she remembered yet more funny stories about her now-dead friends. The time she moved in with Toad temporarily after Yoshi went on a "personal space" thing. She sadly laughed again, before leaning up against the back of the oven.

. . .

**YOSHI**

Yoshi was now sat on the roof, wishing he could've been with someone. His mind drifted to those who he'd killed. Those who's lives had been lost because of him. Daisy, he didn't even know what he did that for. He held his head in his hands and more tears fell from his eyes. He remembered the time he spent with Daisy when Luigi and Mario were out Mario Kart racing, and they'd just talk. She was so close to surviving, and he practically killed her. Then he thought of Toadette, even though that was an accident, he couldn't help but feel extremely guilty. He remembered the time he spent with her, robbing banks and shoplifting. Finally, he thought of Wendy, who he'd murdered in the most brutal way possible. He threw a knife at her face. Once again, he buried his head in his hands and screamed - wanting to get the thoughts out of his head.

. . .

_Well, there's the penultimate chapter. No death, I just wanted to get some of the emotional stuff out of the way. There'll still be some more, but there will be some gore in the next one too - goody goody! Hope you enjoyed!_


	12. Final Showdown

_Hello! Welcome to the finale! Sorry for the wait, I've been wondering whether to keep you waiting longer. Anyway, thanks to all reviewers, and get ready for this chapter!_

. . .

Yoshi | Birdo

Zess T | Tayce T

. . .

**BIRDO**

Birdo was quivering with fear as she was sat in the oven, head in her hands.

"We haven't checked in here!" she could hear Zess T call. Birdo gulped, before preparing herself for what could be next. She heard the door slam open, then immediately slam shut. She heard the footsteps of Zess T as she strode towards the fridge.

"Not in here..." Zess T muttered to Tayce T.

"Should I try in the cupboards?" Tayce T asked.

Zess T paused, "Yes, although Birdo won't be there. She's too large."

Birdo clenched her fists and gritted her teeth, but made herself make no sound.

. . .

**YOSHI**

Yoshi was still sat on the roof, praying that nobody would see him. He continued to think about those who'd been killed within the last few hours. Suddenly, he heard a cackling from the house. He gulped, fearing Birdo may be dead, but made sure he didn't make a sound.

_Caww! Caww!_

He turned behind him and saw flashing red eyes. He gulped again, but shook it off.

"Yoshi, you're being stupid..." he muttered.

_Caww! Caww!_

He turned behind him again and saw many pairs of red eyes, glaring at him. He gulped for a third time, before standing up and wondering what he'd do next.

. . .

**BIRDO**

Birdo could now only hear whispering, after she heard Zess T cackling some weird spell, her and Tayce T were just whispering stuff. Zess T suddenly turned to the oven, and Birdo hid the best way she could. Zess T then turned around again and began whispering more stuff to Tayce T. Birdo noticed that Tayce T was smirking and nodding, looking like she was about to laugh. Birdo gulped as she saw Tayce T take a rolling pin from the counter.

. . .

**YOSHI**

Yoshi decided to take his chances against the red eyes, and slowly picked up a roof tile and threw it in their direction. There were some more caws before the sound of flapping of wings. Yoshi sighed with relief, before turning around.

Where he saw more red eyes.

. . .

**BIRDO**

Birdo looked frightened as she wondered what Tayce T was about to do with the rolling pin. Suddenly, Tayce T walked over to the oven, grabbed the handle and shoved the rolling pin across it. Birdo's eyes widened as she had figured it all out. Zess T smirked as she, too, walked over to the oven. She grabbed one of the dials and turned it to full.

. . .

**YOSHI**

Yoshi held his head in his hands, before thinking for a few seconds. He knew that if he tried to attack these things, he'd probably die.

"C'mon... think..." Yoshi hit his head, before his face lit up. He remembered how he could flutter jump.

He leapt up into the air and managed to avoid the red eyes from one side, but knew they'd chase him. He was now on the edge of the roof, and many, many red eyes were in front of him. It was jump off, or be killed.

. . .

**BIRDO**

The heat in the oven was already extreme. Birdo wasn't sure how long she'd be able to take it before she'd begin to burn. Tears fell from her eyes, but after a few seconds, evaporated. Zess T and Tayce T were laughing as they watched Birdo sit in the oven, clearly in pain. Birdo curled up into a ball and rocked herself slowly.

. . .

**YOSHI**

By now, Yoshi was falling through the air, before beginning to flutter jump. He was smirking at the red eyes as he floated gracefully towards the bottom. He landed with a light thud, before walking into the mansion and pondering his next move. He noticed that most doors were open, except for the one in the kitchen. He slowly crept towards the living room and searched for a weapon.

"TV remote... no good..." Yoshi muttered to himself, throwing the TV remote behind him. However, he noticed a big block with some cheese knives stuck onto it. Yoshi smirked as he walked over to it, grabbing one of the knives.

"You stop there..." Tayce T slammed the door, before smirking at Yoshi.

. . .

**BIRDO**

Now, Birdo was just trying not to be in too much pain - a plan she knew would fail. She decided to just let it happen, before she heard the door slam shut. She wasn't quite sure if it was either someone coming in or out - but she knew the latter was probable. It was slowly getting too much to handle for her, and she was beginning to feel her skin burn.

. . .

**YOSHI**

"I'm not afraid of you." Yoshi stated, picking up the block of knives.

"Likewise." Tayce T smiled.

Yoshi paused, "Have you found Birdo?"

"Yes, and I'm sure she's having a roast of a time." Tayce T smirked, before turning to the kitchen. Yoshi now knew that Birdo was in there in some kind of torture. This made him grit his teeth, tempting him to throw one of his knives.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Tayce T warned, holding up her finger in a stop motion, "I bet you think you're gonna survive all this, don't you? You think you're gonna be the only survivor and tell everybody who wasn't murdered here you were a hero. So you can gain a new status as a hero, and upstage those like Mario, Luigi, even Princess Peach. You've always been jealous of them and their popularity."

"That's ridiculous, I'm the most loved character in the Mario series." Yoshi rolled his eyes.

"You're the most loved character by fans," Tayce T corrected, "But in the Mushroom Kingdom, no one cares about you! And the ones who did were here, and you killed! And then there's Birdo. Sweet, innocent Birdo. Your true love. She's roasting in the very next room as we speak."

Yoshi gritted his teeth.

"You think this is bad? This is just the truth." Tayce T smirked.

Yoshi then lost it, before throwing his knife. It pierced Tayce T's neck, which made her growl in pain. However, she made it clear that she wasn't going any time soon. She grabbed a nearby lamp and stormed towards Yoshi. Yoshi made a quick run for the sofa, before tipping it over her, trapping Tayce T, and bolting out of the living room. With the knives still in hand.

. . .

Birdo was still sat in the oven, feeling her life slowly beginning to slip away. Suddenly, she heard the door fly open in a style only one person could do. Her face lit up as she knew Yoshi was here.

"Well, hello." Zess T greeted, in slight shock, "You've come here to die too?"

Yoshi then took out a knife and held it in a threatening position. He stormed up towards the oven and grabbed the rolling pin. Birdo almost cheered as she saw Yoshi stand in front of the oven. Yoshi pulled the rolling pin out and threw it at Zess T, causing her to fall over as she cried out in pain.

"That's not the end, you know..." Zess T grumbled, slowly getting back up. Yoshi opened the oven door and Birdo came stumbling out, rubbing her skin and glaring at Zess T.

"It's two vs one now..." Yoshi smirked, slowly walking towards Zess T. He looked towards Birdo, signalling to do the same. Birdo looked at his confused, before her face lit up and she copied Yoshi. Yoshi offered the block of cheese knives to Birdo and she took 3 knives from the many that were there.

"Oh, is it now?" Tayce T opened the door, machine gun in hand.

Birdo and Yoshi cringed as they looked at the machine gun. Yoshi then lifted the knife and Tayce T loaded the gun.

"Stop." Zess T muttered. Everybody turned to her, "I can't let you just kill each other like this. I WANT IN."

Zess T took a butchers knife from a counter and walked towards Birdo, "You, you pink, ugly rat."

Zess T then grabbed Birdo's leg and slashed it once. Birdo squealed in pain and Yoshi grabbed her, before pointing to the corner, "Stay back."

Kung fu music then played in the background as Yoshi held his hands together. Fruit began to fall from the sky and Yoshi sliced them all in half with ease. The music went silent and Yoshi threw one of the cheese knives at an unexpecting Tayce T. It went straight through her head and she let out a painful moan before dropping to the floor.

"You're gonna pay for that, with your precious Birdo..." Zess T muttered, before attempting to take the machine gun. However, Yoshi shoved a cheese knife through her hand and she moaned in pain. Yoshi then took the machine gun.

"Any last words?" he asked.

Zess T gritted her teeth, before a gunshot went through her head. Yoshi constantly kept firing gunshots through her head until Zess T's head was no more than a few brains and blood spewing from every possible place. Birdo breathed happily behind Yoshi as she knew what had happened, but Yoshi stood in shock. He had a terrible pain in his stomach. He looked down to see a butchers knife, the handle just poking through his stomach.

Yoshi moaned as he dropped to the floor.

. . .

_Well, that's it for this fic! I hope you enjoyed it! The sequel will start off with whether Yoshi survives and, obviously, the next unlucky 13 being faced with the murders. That won't be until much later, though. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the first fic I've actually finished :)_


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